Here we are at the Cheltenham Literature Festival, signing books and having a whale of time. We love chatting to people about The Age-Well Project, answering your questions and hearing your stories. At every event we speak at, we’re asked about menopause. Either during a Q & A session or, quietly, afterwards.
Our response is always the same. Our project is about living the longest, healthiest, happiest life we can. We know that menopause can be brutal, but we hope it’s one, relatively short-lived, hurdle in a long and happy life. We know how awful it can feel when you’re in the middle of it and urge everyone to seek help that works for them.
I’ve been taking bio-identical HRT for just over a year, and feel great on it, but I know it’s a very subjective and personal choice. I’m also very aware of the controversies around it, and long-term health risks. Research linking the most commonly available form of HRT to an increased risk of breast cancer was published in The Lancet just a few weeks ago. I was cheered, however, by a study published in the US this week suggests that extended exposure to oestrogen reduces the risk of cognitive decline. I’ve written more about my personal approach to menopause here and here.
Scientists had long assumed that menopause was some sort of evolutionary quirk, as most female animals die once they are no longer able to reproduce. But in her brilliant book, The Slow Moon Climbs: The Science, History, and Meaning of Menopause, Susan Mattern suggests that, rather than being redundant, menopausal women are key to our survival as a species. For our hunter-gatherer forebears, survival of the next generation depended on those who could provide more food than they consumed. Children and child-rearing women were unable to collect enough food for their needs. It was up to the older women to, if not bring home the bacon, bring home the wilderbeest. In today’s foraging tribes, like the Hadza, Mattern writes, women “reach peak foraging productivity in their 50s and continue to produce a caloric surplus through old age.”
My take-out from this is that post-menopausal women have evolved to be busy, engaged and productive. And while writing The Age-Well Project may not be quite as useful as foraging for my tribe, I’m thrilled to bits that it’s come into my life after the age of 50, with the new opportunities and excitements that it brings. As longevity increases, we are only fertile for a small percentage of our adult lives. Once we leave that behind, there’s a lot of time to be productive in other ways. Like writing a book about healthy ageing and having the opportunity to talk about it at wonderful events. We couldn’t have done that in the child-rearing years, and we’re grateful for the chance to do it now. Annabel and I celebrate the fact that we no longer have to worry about periods, pregnancy (wanted or otherwise) tampons, cramps or contraception and can get on with all the wonderful things that come when fertility goes.
The word ‘menopause’ was only coined 300 years ago as (male) doctors sought to medicalise the transition women go through from reproductive to not. They described it as a set of symptoms which left women weak and vulnerable, rather than recognising it as an essential, and empowering, life stage. What is exciting today is seeing so many women addressing the challenges and opportunities of menopause and beyond. As Susan Mattern explained in a recent interview, ‘Menopause is a transition to a natural, evolved stage of life that has been critical to the success of our species in the past and remains critical to our future, and it ought to be valued and respected. It’s a solution, not a problem.’
WORLD MENOPAUSE DAY 2019
As part of our Age-Well Project we’ve been lucky enough to connect with many women who are pushing back against the embarrassment and fear surrounding the menopause. They’re taking it centre stage and making it part of the national conversation as well as offering help and support to those finding this stage of life tough. So, in honour of today’s World Menopause Day 2019, let me name check a few of them. Do look out for them on social media, follow their blogs and call on them if you need support.
TELL US ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCE
What’s your experience of the menopause – are you through it and feeling great? Or finding it tough? What’s helped you? Maybe you’re a man supporting a female partner through this transition. Let us know in the comments below.
Susan
Menopause was OK for me. My thermostat seemed turned up a few notches, so I suddenly feel hot and sweaty, although luckily I don’t actually get red in the face. I sleep with far less bedding on me too.
Apart from that, the worst thing is putting on weight – it just keeps creeping up and up. Very hard to deal with.
Loss of fertility never bothered me, I’ve had my two children. In fact was glad all that messy stuff was over – saves money too!
Sleeplessness is maybe related, maybe not. I do struggle with this, it’s mostly manageable though.
Thanks Sasha. We’re glad the periods are over – all those cramps. The sleeplessness is harder though
Before the menopause my periods were longer and my cycle was shorter, so I had a period for most of each month. I was so happy when my periods stopped. Hot flushes arrived, but no depression or insomnia, and I have good energy levels. In fact, I still get hot flushes 16 years later. I heard a gynaecologist on the radio say there are some women for whom the hot flushes don’t end. I get a few each day and night, but they are so much better then a period!
Thanks Ingrid. We’re so happy to say goodbye to periods!
My periods ceased completely when I was 52. I was really pleased and looked forward to having finished. I put up with the symptoms thinking they would stop soon. Now I’m nearly 66 and it’s getting worse. Coldness then massive hot flush, leading to a loss of energy and complete feeling of weakness, tingling lower legs, which can last ,up to 15 minutes. I wake up hot usually two or three times a night, then frequently I can’t get back to sleep, which makes me tired the next day or if I can sleep on cuts into my day.. I’m average weight, non smoker, very moderate drinker, I eat a good diet ( including meal suggestions on this site), I’m a hiker, gardener, badminton player, dancer, but I often have to sit it out until I’ve recovered equilibrium. When I’ve asked my doctor for HRT, he refuses. He has never asked me about my symptoms. I feel all these years are too long and I really want it sorted. So I’m considering the expensive private clinic route, which I’m cross at having to resort to. I have flushes around 12 a day.
Hi Kate
I’m really sorry to hear you’re still suffering, and not getting support from your doctor. I had a very unhelpful chat with my GP ‘it’s all normal’ and decided to go the private route. Expensive yes, but I work as a freelancer so my income depends on me turning up at work every day and feeling my best. I don’t get any paid sick leave so feel that investing in my health is worthwhile. Sounds like you are living a very healthy lifestyle in every other way. Good luck, Susan x
I had a complete hysterectomy when I was 45 and was put on HRT which I was on for 15 years. At that time I had a breast lump and after it was removed I was told NO MORE HRT. I am now 76 and still have sweats… not hot flashes because they come and go… mine is all the time. My doctor cannot find anything to help me. So, my feelings on HRT don’t go off of it. I’m sorry I didn’t take my chances then.
Now 55, my main symptom for menopause a few years back was hot flushes – really extreme 30-50 a day (seldom at night) – constant red and sweaty and temp regulation all over the shop. I got absolutely sick of it, did a load of reading and tried stuff. Giving up black and green tea cut them by about 30% – apparently there is a substance in tea, can’t remember, but its not tannin – that has an adverse impact. But then I got adventurous and boiled up a herbal ‘tea’ based on all the internet research I had done using dried herbs from Neal’s Yard. Hey presto – after a week, all hot flushes gone. Any time they crept back just made more ‘tea’. We’re all so different and some of the herbs clearly affect hormonal balance – but happy to share, if anyone, like me, doesn’t believe HRT is a good idea and has the time to boil up herbs and experiment with relieving their symptoms. Felt very empowered to control it and loving my symptom-free menopause! This website is great – just discovered it today and will be back. Thanks for creating it.
Hi Lisa, we’re so pleased you found us, and thanks for your kind words! Your meno herb tea sounds fantastic – we’d love to share it. And have you been in touch with our friends positive pause.co.uk ? I’m sure that they are their followers would love to know more about your success story.
I am in Australia and my hot flushes were terrible for a long time, especially in the summer. About two years ago I gave up all sugar and every product that contained any sugar, apart from fruit. I now only have a hot flush if I weaken and have something with added sugar. I know it’s hard to do but so worth it in the end and the added bonus that real food tastes so much better now.🍎
That’s so interesting, Sharr. Thanks for sharing. We’ve cut out almost all processed sugar and also find sweet things are now too sweet!